my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
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