I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
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