yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Apparently you make a good broom.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
