I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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