just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
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Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.