Texts From Last Night

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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face

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  (617): yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face http://tfl.nu/3atc
  Replies (7) Good night (2030) Bad night (837)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified

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  (513): Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified http://tfl.nu/jq99
  Replies (20) Good night (922) Bad night (2925)
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  (361): View more from Texas

  What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?

  (1-361): View more from Texas

  These are the tickets we got last night.

  (361): View more from Texas

  Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?

  (1-361): View more from Texas

  Yes...yes you did.

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  (361): What are these yellow papers in the kitchen? (1-361): These are the tickets we got last night. (361): Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear? (1-361): Yes...yes you did. http://tfl.nu/myva
  Replies (25) Good night (4474) Bad night (778)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?

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  (251): Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone? http://tfl.nu/sjee
  Replies (39) Good night (877) Bad night (3130)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  good thing vaginas are great cup holders

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  (717): good thing vaginas are great cup holders http://tfl.nu/j578
  Replies (47) Good night (1180) Bad night (4336)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I wish I had a frozen water bed.

  (253): View more from Washington

  best. idea. ever.

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  (734): I wish I had a frozen water bed. (253): best. idea. ever. http://tfl.nu/r1w7
  Replies (58) Good night (5936) Bad night (2206)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"

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  (508): I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money" http://tfl.nu/engr
  Replies (14) Good night (6497) Bad night (1228)
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  (365): View more from

  Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine

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  (365): Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine http://tfl.nu/mm7j
  Replies (13) Good night (4778) Bad night (1006)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.

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  (214): Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds. http://tfl.nu/9ird
  Replies (6) Good night (1064) Bad night (478)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.

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  (251): Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile. http://tfl.nu/y0n1
  Replies (4) Good night (1078) Bad night (462)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.

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  (513): FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy. http://tfl.nu/7k1b
  Replies (2) Good night (903) Bad night (416)
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  (347): View more from New York

  Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?

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  (347): Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it? http://tfl.nu/mhp5
  Replies (1) Good night (584) Bad night (369)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.

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  (405): In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win. http://tfl.nu/zkyh
  Replies (4) Good night (712) Bad night (329)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life

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  (978): So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life http://tfl.nu/9wbt
  Replies (1) Good night (482) Bad night (224)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor

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  (613): Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor http://tfl.nu/mn1u
  Replies (3) Good night (546) Bad night (162)

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