your room smells of hookers.
And success
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
