Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
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I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
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do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.