i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
That reminds me...we need to get swords
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
