she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
