I should be sponsored by Trojan
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
