Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
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