mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He shit in the fireplace
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