i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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