She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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