if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
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she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
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Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
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