That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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