All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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