I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
