every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
