how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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