the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Randomize
