don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Let the clothes fall where they may.
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