At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Randomize