I'm really into asian looking animals
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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