It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
