I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize