Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Someone signed my nipple.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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