we're blogging at a bar
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize