Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Actions speak louder than pants.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
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