yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
