Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize