I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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