Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize
