I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
