return my video game
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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