i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
