I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
