I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize