hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I need water and some morals
Randomize
