You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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