chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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