is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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