if i can run in heels then i can drive
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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