I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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