im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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