She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
