Heybabeimwearingurpanties
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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