we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
