Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
She needs sedatives and a leash
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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