I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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